Jesus Paid it ALL
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a Crimson Stain
He washed it white as snow
We sang that old hymn this morning at church. If I’m going to be honest, I wanted to sit down and bawl my head off. Maybe it is just PMS but I don’t think so . . .
I grew up in a Christian home; in fact my parents were missionaries in the frozen tundra of Alaska. I was the oldest in my family and a people pleaser. I never did drugs, never drank before I was 21 and basically kept my parents from feeling like they weren’t terrible at their job. I never really saw my true depravity and that lead to a pretty arrogant and superior young woman.
Every once in a while, I would realize I wasn’t perfect. Like the time I tripped and fell down a whole set of stairs after an older gentlemen had praised me for my “maturity”. But it really wasn’t until I began to have children of my own that I began to see myself for who I really was. My children brought out this monster in me that I never knew existed!
I began to see that I truly did need a Savior and that my heart was dark and evil, and wanted to go its own way. I was in desperate need of a Redeemer.
This terrible place of seeing how depraved I was as a mother was the moment of change for me. God began to show me that I was just as much in need of a Savior as anybody else, that my sin was just as evil and destructive as the next person. He slowly softened my heart and I became less judgmental. (How can you judge when you know in the deepest darkest place in your heart it’s just like theirs or even worse. . .?) Evil is evil, sin is sin and it all turns us away from God.
Jesus paid it ALL –
I did nothing to save myself
All to Him I owe –
I owe Him everything!
Sin had left a Crimson Stain –
The stain on my heart I could not in my own strength make clean
He Washed it White as Snow! –
God did EVERYTHING
What can you say to that? In the words of another hymn, Oh Sacred Head Now Wounded
What language shall I borrow?
To Thank Thee dearest friend
For this Thy dying sorrow
Thy pity without end
Oh, make me Thine forever
And should I fainting be
Lord, let me never, never
Outlive my love for Thee
2 thoughts on “Jesus Paid It ALL”
Great to read your blog! I miss those deep conversations we used to try to have, in the midst of kids running around and creating havoc! Can't say that I miss the continual havoc though. it's nice to have it in small doses and send it back home.
Hey, I can totally relate to this. Thanks for sharing.
I just started one too! Cool coincidence!?